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clothing i might like to own

posted 2023.07.27
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most people get their clothing from, like, a store. or a website that’s basically a store. and this is good for the most part except that stores haven’t yet tapped into my limitless pool of creativity. to illustrate some of the possibilities yet untapped, i have compiled a list of ideas with crude images of how they could look.

i also had some of my friends vote on their favorites of these ideas. their opinions are often wrong, but i value enough to include them in my haphazard ranking of ideas. (because who would care about this list if there were no judgment or competition involved!) therefore i have listed the ideas in groups of five based on a combination of my opinion and how far they got in our informal tournament.

if you have strong feelings on any of the clothing ideas in particular, please send a message using the feedback button near the top of the page.

honorable mentions: ideas other people had

from this reddit post.

this one made the rounds on the internet. idk the original source.

21-25

the idea is that you would carry around a marker and other people could add a tally mark if they wanted. i once did this but it was for the chalkboard outside my dorm in college.

this would combo with a pair of shoes that has waldo on it. so people would give up on finding him and you’d say “he was right here the whole time!!!” then they’d giggle.

i like when objects or walls have a lot of graffiti on them

a multi-brimmed baseball cap, drawn by yours truly

16-20

mandelbrot fractal shoes

a necklace that is a miniature belt (not a leather choker; thicker, like a belt, and looser, like a necklace. a beltlace)

this was one of my favorites and out of the four people i’ve shown it to not a single one has appreciated it. i’ve tried explaining it but that doesn’t really help1

11-15

i’ve always loved how seattle’s park signs look. the graphic design feels like something out of a children’s book or point-and-click game from the late 90s.

cat ear headphones step aside

(alternate caption) “i wonder what’s in there…”

the inspiration for this whole thing to begin with was that i was really hoping i could get the flag of seychelles on a shirt. not like a picture of it on the chest, but more like the flag of seychelles if it were sewn into the shape of a shirt instead of a rectangle.

6-10

the fezdora

based on the iconic TOP 4 BABIES ALL TIME PAST & FUTURE

1-5

my personal favorite and the runner-up in the voting. uh oh :)

based on the three utilities problem in math. it solves the problem using the topology of the shirt.2 this shirt was described as having “a certain charm to it”.

based on The Wake of the Ferry II by John Sloan. i learned about this painting in art history class, the first college class i ever took.

the winner of the voting among my friends was fremont tom. frankly i don’t see #1 for it, but it is a fun shirt.


  1. you see, it’s like all those souvenir shirts that say like “i went to new york and all i got was this stupid t-shirt”, but it’s for the store which already ruins the joke, but then the last clause subverts the joke even more by taking it too literally (because it’s not implied to mean the shirt is stupid stupid, y’know?). 

  2. well ok actually the top lines should go, like, into the collar. but i guess when i drew it, it felt more intuitive from a front view that they would somehow magically warp down to the bottom.