shortform

my idea for a sport

(the best name i can think of is “skipball” but i think there must be a better one)

skipball is played on a basketball court in teams of 4. the offense starts on the baseline with one player holding a racquetball. the defense starts behind half court. the offense gets a point if they can run the ball across the opponent’s baseline without the player holding the ball ever being touched. the offense is allowed to pass the ball to each other, but the ball has to bounce exactly once before it reaches the other player. players are not allowed to hold or push each other.

skipball is played as best of 5 sets with each team getting 11 tries per set to score points. if you score on the 11th try, you get to continue doing tries until you fail one.

note 550

663: for when 663 is enough

note 549

i think the new hip trend for teens will be saying chinese phrases & mocking people who can’t pronounce them well

note 548

Lake “Wobegon” is wildly overhyped if you ask me

note 547

see you later this year… NOT!!!

note 546

board game with no rules just cool cryptic art

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612: for when 611 isn’t enough

note 544

Hey guys, it’s me, The Virtuous Rapper, and today I’m going to be rapping about compassion and humility.

note 543

does anyone know a good starter bank for someone who is just getting into heisting

note 542

orpheic thinking works

note 541

you better watch out bitch. i just got +1/+1 and trample until end of turn

note 540

oho—your cage hasn’t but a fraction the beauty and splendor of mine!

note 539

(getting fired) this could have been an email.

note 538

i’ve been preparing to be 23 my whole life

not 537

my contributions to science have gone unnoticed due to their unimportance and dubious veracity

note 536

sex criminals sound like they should be cooler than other criminals, but actually they are much less cool

note 535

in court, the next worst thing after a death sentence is a life sentence

note 534

i refuse to clip my toenails until we do something about gun violence in this country

note 533

some of you wouldn’t last a minute inside my murder chamber

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i promise! i was sitting there and the eschaton just immanentized itself!