note 462
if sex is the “little death”, then call me immortal 😎
note 461
ok fine. if you really want a prophecy then get this. in the next couple of years, they are going to LAUNCH the earth… into SPACE
note 460
no one has asked to hear any of my prophecies lately
note 459
yeah i have Body Image Issues. the Issue is not enough women have been entranced by Images of my Body
note 458
love it when newspapers attribute information to “sources”. oh i thought you conjured it from thin air
note 457
hiiiiii what if we played a little game called We bare our souls to each other and form an everlasting bond? just a thought i had. lol
note 455
(at subway) can i order the train? haha! just kidding, i know you are a sandwich shop. can i order the sandwich
note 456
(being shoved into a locker and crying) its a good thing i have such a rich inner life. or i would be really mad right now
note 454
(on america’s got talent) hi judges. my talent is avant-garde performance art. around my neck is an electric shock collar, which every member of the audience is able to trigger by downloading a free app on their phone
note 453
girl are you drunk. because your the only henn i sey
note 452
(as god is unleashing his wrath on me) loooooll im living rent free in ur head bro. u salty, god? lol (i get smited and explode instantly)
note 451
thats right! i omit apostrophes sometimes! why? because i dont give A FUCK!!!!!!!!! #rebel
note 450
grandmas secret ingredient was Natural and artificial Flavors
note 449
(me when i see a cool manifold) omg, this is going in my top ten manifolds of all time video
note 448
villains need to learn to do their own bidding. i am not going to keep doing it for them
note 447
i tried to warn everyone about 9/11 before it happened, but i was 1 year old so no one understood me. so sorry to everyone that i was not older.
note 446
does anyone know if we still live in a society? is that, like, still a thing?
note 445
friday was the name of the drug. the cowboy was on drugs
note 444
i’ve been microdosing meth
note 443
i am part of the computer science department aka the school of hard socks